As a dance studio owner of many years my teachers and I have taught hundreds of bridal couples coming along for lessons in the lead up to their big day. And we feel that whilst for most couples this dance is just a small part of their special day – we feel that the way you approach the dance says a whole lot about you, and in itself is truly important! So – here we go – with the 10 (no longer) secret reasons why the wedding dance is so important.
1. This one for the grooms who have told their finances they are DEFINATELY NOT doing a bridal dance. There’s famous quote that says ‘Dance is the vertical expression of a horizontal desire.’ Need I say more?
2. Just like life – your wedding and in particular the bridal dance can be stressful. You need to multi task – remember steps you struggle to remember – and this can be a really tough experience. Observe you and your partners reactions in this new situation as you are learning and you will see how you both cope when stressful situations hit you you later on in the marriage.
3. Things go wrong. Dancing is not a perfect art form. You – or you’ll partner – will make mistakes, just when you don’t want them too! And whilst a mistake made when performing brain surgery is REALLY bad, a mistake in a dance routine is – well – par for the course. Now don’t get us wrong – we want your dance to be perfect too. How you both handle dance errors is probably indicative as to how you’ll handle each others small, unimportant mistakes as you go along through life.
4. Are you a perfectionist? Then the wedding dance can add a particular stress to the couple if either or both wish to look like professional dancers on the night – and the wedding is six months away (it takes years to dance like a pro – by the way). In life – being a perfectionist can hold you back – I like the phrase I learnt recently – be prolific rather than perfect – and I think this applies to a lot of life as well.
5. Dancing is fun for no reason. As we get older we forget how much fun it can be to go down a slide, swing on a swing, kick leaves, build a sandcastle, and boogie like crazy to your favourite tunes – all activities that are done purely for fun. Everything is done for a reason as we get older. A couple who have fun together, laugh together, stay together. Make this fun!
6. Are you doing this dance for your partner, but you are just not that into it? Oftentimes the bride (and sometimes the groom) has a vision about the first dance but the groom just can’t get excited about. To be frank he’d rather have grandma wipe his cheek with her (saliver soaked) hanky everyday for a year than do a bridal dance! But if he comes along with the best attitude he can muster then he’s a keeper – as life throws a whole lot of similar scenarios at us!
7. How do you move together? Can you fall into an amiable, relaxed rhythm with your partner – swaying side to side together, face to face? Then it’s likely you’ll do that in life too!
8. Remember those group projects in school where you felt being in a group brought the standard of your work DOWN? Well, in this newly forming group of two – your combined efforts in life is going to be MUCH bigger than you alone – and nothing displays this better than your first dance (it just wouldn’t look nearly as good if you did it on your own).
9. Sometimes we are going to have to do things for others. As I mentioned above it could be your future spouse you are doing this for because you love them, but a bridal dance is a lovely gesture for your guests too. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard even a non dancer say “I love watching dance”. Your guests will love it, and you! And, by the way, people hate professional dancers at a wedding (it stops everyone from taking the floor afterwards). So – make some mistakes and your party will ROCK!
10. Its part of the ritual. Sure, I’m the first one to question why we do something – but sometimes rituals are just a lovely part of life. You are getting married after all – so enjoy the wedding cars, the gown and suits, the flowers, the ceremony, the first kiss, the honeymoon and the DANCE!